time for a it's-monday-night-and-this-week-is-gunna-suck-drink.
I don't drink during the week.... well, except for Bailey's Tuesdays, which I have to start implementing further.
My right arm is handcuffed to my leg... Please help.
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
Gosh I haven't been pantsless in front of anyone for a while. It's time for me to pick up my game. We need a party. I need some rum.
I tried to interpretive dance to Candy Shop to stop the awkwardness.
"So you think you can dance" turned into "so you think you can run and slide across the bar"...Jack Daniels wins
Trust me that one dick you don't want. It's like a whale... That's swam too many oceans...
I am making it a rule that only people I am comfortable around enough to not have to put a bra on are allowed for Sunday funday. I think that's a good rule for someone who started drinking alone at noon while everyone else here sipped their coffee.
I love getting kicked out of places. Its like winning a little league game
After a while I was so wet that I started crying. HE MADE ME SO HORNY I WEPT.
I just bought a mini nerf gun so he could make a bowl out of it, I deserve the fuck buddy of the year award!
i just woke up on the desk in his dorm with him snoring in my vagina. better than last week waking up to a different guy puking on my bare ass i guess.
so this hot guy who looks like brad pitt circa troy era in my physics lab is staring at me right now and it's taking all the willpower I have not to procreate with him right now.
Not going to make it tonight. Some cougar at the bar just told me she has dibs on my dick.
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