I met a girl last nite that charged by the inch. i didnt have enough money but i figured shed be a good deal for u
she is unbelievable! ever pee on a girl?
not while she was awake
You just kept insisting that you and the homeless man went way back, and that you bonded over how cold you both were.
thank you for reminding me that I stumbled into a public place drunk at 9am wearing a chicks pants.
Received a verbal warning at work for "riding in a trash receptacle, violating professionalism & infection control."
You got in the cab and told the cab driver "we only have seven bucks so you better drive fucking fast".
Btw: some husbands are not impressed by me trying to snap photos of their wives camel toe.
Law school has no idea what kind of prospect they have coming in. I just convinced a cop not to take me to jail by asking him if he really felt like cleaning puke out of his car tonight.
I was wasted and the time changed. I blame the male strippers.
I vaguely remember hanging my bra off the ceiling fan and chugging a beer during sex
College has turned you into quite the multi tasker huh?
Then again, he has huge mansions.
*manboobs.
She answered the door wearing a basket, said it was the only clean thing she had.
Nothing quite like the "I had sex you a month ago and now we're stopped at the same 4 way" wave
I guess daylight savings isn't a holiday we need to celebrate for three days...
Beer Olympics must happen in honor of the legit Olympics.
Randomize
