I thought she was going to get passionate and throw her on the bed and fuck her, but she just started breaking stuff.
That's the thing about women.
hey dude i know youre in the next room but me and your sister need a condom, got any i could borrow?
if I see one grey pube I'm spitting his penis out!
She laid down on my bed and played "I want you to want me" on my laptop. subtle.
I'm too drunk to be surrounded by this many indians
How do you manage to be drunk and a racial minority so often?
i don't understand how she was down there for so long, she's like a mermaid, a blowjob giving mermaid.
He did not appreciate the "you did reuse the diamond" comment when looking at his new fiance's ring.
No Bryan wants to get drunk, rub inappropriate dudes legs, talk about my vagina and send me pics of his boomerang dick. That's not how you watch basketball.
That's how he does EVERYTHING!
Not only does DQ have s'mores shakes, sonic has a hot dog in a pretzel bun, and Wendy's has a burger in a pretzel bun. Important things are happening.
I snapchatted his face mid sex. Needless to say, I don't think I'll ever see him again.
That's Danny the boy who threw up in the Doritos bag
To be honest, the last time I saw him he had a jesus costume on telling people to pray to his bible.
So he's at the chuch?
No, hooters.
He lit my hand on fire and bought me chicken nuggets. I'm in love.
you had her IN YOUR BED NO PANTS AND YOU GAVE HER THW BOOT?!?!?!
Stage five clinger bro. had to go.
I didn’t spend $100 for a wax to sit here and listen to you FT your brother to complain about how bad the Jets are.
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