it was the worst sex ever in the history of sex. i mean ever. and he thought he was great. actually told me he was the best id ever had...what was i supposed to say? lol...i've had better times by myself. seriously.
You supply the liquor and I'll "accidently" forget my bathing suit.
Deal!
Just saw an ad for "Liver-aid" how has this not become a life changing drug for millions?
In between when I last wrote and now have screwed a Swiss guy on a hostel bathroom floor. Okay, real life?
Idk. Each time I ask him about double teaming a woman with Dennis Rodman he just giggles. We will never know what to believe.
All I want in life is to get high, take a shower, and him to go down on me. Simultaneously. That's legit my idea of heaven.
Once you mention butt plugs, conversations always take a turn for the worst.
I came in and I guess my parents didn't hear me. My dad just said "Don't be lazy, RIDE IT." to my mom. Never coming home again.
hey now, it was 6 bucks for 5 shots. you would have lost your panties too.
I'm taking ecstasy it's gonna be that kind of Vegas trip
I'm dipping store brand pepperoni pizza in bacon flavored ranch dressing. Obesity tastes so good.
I just want to eat my penis shaped food in front of you and see how you feel about it.
Our lives are a motherfucking joke
not only was there glitter in the toilet after i peed, but there was some on the toilet paper after i wiped. this cant be healthy.
oh.. my GOD my dad just text me... "i need a naked women" ........... help?
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