Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
life lesson# 3: saying thank you on a subway really means "im not a native new yorker, so please feel free to touch my ass"
hmm. interesting. explain how you came across this knowledge.
i sneezed. he said bless you. i said thank you. he groped. i again said thank you.
I love seeing the creepers that friend request me outside of facebook. its like seeing a unicorn in the middle of campus.
she is using a fork to eat popcorn and refuses to drink gatorade out of anything but a margarita glass... did i mention the popcorn is on a plate?
His mom walked into the kitchen smiling, made a scotch on the rocks, hit my bong, and told us goodnight enthusiastically. He's suddenly more appealing to me.
And when we woke up we made beer pancakes. Great start to a family picture day.
I can feel the fear and stress bubbling in my stomach. Or maybe that is the pregnancy.
So good!! I became real good friends with an adorable black lesbian couple from Baltimore and a man in a diaper.
I believe in weed hangovers. To say the least.
So when the drug raid cops tell you, you should get out of the relationship, it probably means its time.
I lost my bar virginty and made out with a dwarf. It was a good night
That sounds worse than that time you thought out an entire story of how big bird would kill you
Are you vicariously golddigging through me?!
I've decided if you aren't here in fifteen minutes I'm leaving you for Mario the 75 year old Colombian bartender.
You rolled over grabbed my crotch and said "that's my waffle." I'm sleeping on the couch next time.
Randomize
