The world would be so much better with thought bubbles.
The one night I bring a girl home you leave the footloose soundtrack playing.
Even My mom was ashamed of me bringing her home, she pulled me aside, and told me i can do better than, "butter faces"
I just had to blow my nose on a mcdonalds receipt in my car. Its time to stop doing coke.
I have six drafts of messages to you that just say "blood" and I have no idea where they came from.
My face feels like its stuck between a ball sack and an asshole.
It's official. This guy and I are going gay for each other. We're tasting the fucking rainbow.
Please just fuck her. She's new to LA and doesn't know anyone nice.
If I wasn't stoned and knee deep in cheese and crackers I'd help.
Just made a diving catch to save a handle of Fireball falling out of the car. ESPN worthy.
He woke me up, handed me a ringing phone and said break up w her for me. That hung over.
Being a fine ass woman in a world full of fuckboys is the realest struggle I've ever known.
And he's a cuddle champ. I know because I slept over because I don't know what boundaries are.
Fuck it, i havent messed around in half a year. I have sexual tension with a fire hydrant.
the twins are trying to figure out which one is the one doing body shots off a janitor in this picture
Randomize
