you can still come hang out if you want
I really don't feel like watching you play video games
I do no wrong. I am always right. Right? I forget why I am sending this. It seemed relevant.
Just woke up. First thing I see: Little brother eating last night's jello shots thinking they're reg jello.
look mate, i'm pretty sure 14 texts saying "fuck me. fuck me now" more than passes the legal benchmark for consent.
The savings from $3 shots still doesn't add up to plan-b
I can't. He's too cute and my tongue is too long.
Should I be alarmed that you're a regular enough at a bar to show up in sweatpants?
Hospital. He tried giving some kid a stone cold stunner during a real fight.
That's like.....u just dangled a sex carrot in front of me then took it away!
I just found out two girls I dated met each other, bonded over how much they hate me, started dating and are gonna get married soon.
You started crawling towards a moving train. Maybe you should take it easy next time
I'm drinking with a guy who apparently blew my dog sitter.
I wasn't even hungover I was just mourning my dignity
1 why did you tell them where i peed last night and 2 where the fuck are you
She called a 10 year old handsome and we gave her a look that was equal parts confused and “what the hell is wrong with you”
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