what happens if a cat eats a birth control pill? i mean i don't care about the cat i really just don't want to get pregnant
Even though he is humpbacked he is really good in bed.
She finally woke up and said, "Me- nothing, potato peeler- 1." And rolled back over.
Decided against hooking up with creepy stalker guy for a ride to work. I feel I've earned a few self respect points back.
i feel like this needs to be a 'lose some teeth' kind of weekend.
Tell him I thought his Superman stand on your bed and cum all over your back was quite funny
you don't know what its like to have your bartender tell you that you owe him beer money infront of your mother at 3pm on a tuesday
You know it's time to cut back when your unemployed drug dealer roommate tells you that you party too hard.
I think having a vagina should be considered a skill, give me a break.
At some point, you're going to have to talk to a tree and do what it says
I think it was a smart move. Quickest way to get over a guy, hook up with his friends.
He texted his hospitalized grandma while inside me, so really a perfect gentleman.
I'm sorry I didn't get you anything for your birthday
It's just you didn't get me the fucking bear suit last year
She's Jesus crazy. And one if not more other forms of crazy. She's 2.5+ crazy.
I'm not winning any crowns in the Miss Emotionally Stable pageant either...
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