Yeah, we spent most of the evening making fun of the drunk girl until we realized it was you.
I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
i would think by now you'd realize that my penis does whatever the fuck it wants and i have no control over the situation
I dont think punching her boob is the type of reverse psychology that will get her to blow you.
by the end of the night two people were passed out at the table, three on the couches, and one in the bathroom. it looked like someone pumped sleeping gas into the middle of a dinner party.
It was more like a tour de entire bottle of wine in 14 minutes
For every drunk face picture you send me, I'm gonna send a wholesome family photo.
Meant to have fun, ended up giving speech about consent to guy at bar. Feminist side feels happy. Orgasms side feels confused and betrayed.
I smelled him yesterday and almost relapsed he's like cocaine
The cops spotted my on my walk of shame down the boardwalk and gave me a ride home. I'm starting to make a name for myself here.
He sang a ten minute song about me sitting on his face and eating quesadillas. Pretty sure I have to marry him.
He stopped eating me out to remind me to look at the stars
this old people party is bangin. they have apple cider with everclear in it
I once went to target high on hydrocodone. I assure you, they can handle unrespectable.
I swear I only fuck him for the huge bottle of smart water he gives me afterwards.
Randomize
