I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
my text book just quoted the cookie monster
I just ate a cashew that looked EXACTLY like your dick.
seriously who else gets carried home puking from a fucking mary kay party?
He'll choke me during sex but he won't eat a strip of bacon. Vegetarians are weird.
Everyone knows relationships are a winter sport
And I just want to be like your tongue is not a FUCKING sword
I don't know what to think. Also, I decided to take a bath...sorry in advance if I flood the bathroom.
He walked into the bar, took a deep sniff and said "this place is fertile and ready for my seed" then calmly walked to the service area
You just referred to a pillow with a stolen bra strapped to it as "she". Let that sink in for a minute.
It wasn't a great time! You grabbed me, picked me up, and make me pee in the sink!
Senior week was like trying to herd cats. Very drunk cats.
You put a bag of sliced onions in the microwave then screamed, "voila, onion rings!"
Dude chill patience is a virtue.
WHY DOES PATIENCE HAVE TO BE A VIRTUE, WHY CAN'T HURRY THE FUCK UP BE A VIRTUE?
You laid on the floor and pet their rug. and then demanded Voss water.
Randomize
