# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
Reading in my econ of energy textbook about the US' largest oil spill from the 1990's.. guess i can't sell this one back either
Do you remember Kelly my alter personality? She talked like a man and would sing amazing grace?
I'm doing homework tonight but if you end up going out drinking I would like one courtesy peer pressure text.
My dads not up on pop culture but he's not dumb enough to believe your 2 girls 1 cup reference at dinner was from the bible.
No one parties like Jon. He once stole a cops hat, ran like the wind, partied all night with it, and dropped it off at the station the next day with a box of donuts as an appology.
At the end of the date, he asked if he could kiss me. I really wanted to say "dude, I didn't shave for nothing"
I woke up with chocolate melted between my tits. I'd say that's a win for all parties involved.
You'll pass into the great gay beyond
Where it rains cosmopolitans and scantily clad gogo dancers of all genders direct traffic
That's not "anything", that's you deep throating a mozzarella stick.
he just fucked me for my cheese.
Quit being awkward towards me every time the group is together. They're going to figure out we're fucking.
Dude 4th of July week was our like 5th anniversary of you sending me dick pics ❤️
The wedding is over. Operation sleep with my step-sister has officially begun
So it turns out high me is very efficient. I set 5 alarms to remind me to do things, i made mac and cheese, and i wrote a poem. I'm going places.
Randomize
