You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
U dropped me off n it hit me, i made it inside for exactly shit thirty on the nose, another minute n i would of had brown trowsers
so then we both started to do the walk of shame and she didnt realize we had fucked in her apartment until some lady said hi to her in the elevator
you didnt stop her?
too entertaining
i just got arrested. apparently dont move means dont move.
Obama just said the words "we're all in this together." I wanted to start singing high school musical
he was screaming in a recently acquired accent that he paid for delivery and they could cancel the entire order if they didn't come upstairs
I thought you said it was going to get worse not hilarious.
the delivery boy turned out to be my students mother. now she knows that i have incredibly low standards AND thanks to the fact that he still has dialup the pizza tracker was way off and she rang the bell and he answered mid bong rip.
i love that when i tell my kids and grandkids about how we first met it will be about this little thing called a "poke" on facebook
my mom just asked me about sexting and if I have ever sent a naked picture to anyone. i fucking hate fox news.
No, don't worry. We're not going to get THAT arrested.
Her divorce is going to cut into the amount of time we spend fucking.
I'm in awe of how selfish that is.
Drunk versus high capture the flag: what team is everybody gonna be on?
She fell out the car soaking wet and screaming "im wearing a fedora!" then tryed to seduce him on the front lawn in front of his middle aged neighbor
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU
MANY MANY THINGS AND MOST OF THEM ARE YOUR FUCKING FAULT
Gay?
German.
Pity.
Will Smith has a direct hotline to my emotions
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