$4 taco and $400 parking ticket. i am not a cheap date.
Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
He is such a gentleman, he paid for my plan b
Why would I want to inherit a sex machine used by my grandma?
i really wish facebook had an app for when you are looking at a chick's photo album, you could just skip to the ones where she and/or her friends are dressed like skanks
It was annoying to wait 4 hour for him to be inside for 5 seconds.
I can't wait till you move in so I can stop drinking alone.
it's a Wednesday?
:)
Some guy just bought a handle of cuervo, a curling iron, and a power drill. Paid with a jar of change. I'm torn between avoiding him and befriending him..
He just asked me if I'd be interested in couples therapy. Fuck my life.
It's like wanting to be a vampire vs being a vampire. You don't know the cock lust until it's infected you.
Now some guy that's in my phone as " Alex lip ring hot" is texting me and I don't where life is taking me
he told me he had a dream that he laid his head in my lap and silently gazed up at me. WHY AM I ALWAYS THE DUDE IN RELATIONSHIPS
GO RIDE HIS EYEBROWS INTO THE SUNSET
I was asked to be part of a mmf threesome. I think I'd rather stay home, watching Orange is the New Black and cuddle with my cat though
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