Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
i would never do something against you youre the best i ever had
please tell me you did not just intentionally quote drake..
Zach says you can't see his penis until after we're married...not sure why?! Bt then he said he thinks maybe you already have on the wild animal night!
nothing cures the holiday blues like an open bar
Just wanted to let you know that I always win at "whose ex is crazier" because of you.
life is sad when you just turned 21 and youre doing late night rogaine runs...
His sombrero wouldn't fit in the car and I had to buy him some Jack to make him stop bitching. You owe me
They should have to wear some identification that warns you to stay away. Like one of those cones dogs wear to keep them from biting stitches. CONE OF SHAME.
Medically speaking as your gynecologist and your girlfriend, that is not a rash.
And we're breaking up
You are the funniest drunk Jew I know. Never in my life have I witnessed someone respond, "Is your dick kosher?" while being picked-up on.
I had a drinkin contest with a person that didnt exsist, fuck withdrawl day
Hold on are you sure that we dont have another roommate?
Yes.
You were yelling at the mannequin and saying "DON'T LOOK AT ME"
I just remembered that the guy I slept with last night has "USDA PRIME" tattooed on his ass
He put your tit in his mouth. Professionalism is out the window after that.
okay valid
yeah. i tried to refuse to leave unless the burger king himself escorted me out. that didnt fly
Randomize
