i found out what alaskan girls practice during those six months of darkness
Btw, I'm really high so I apologize if anything I say gets translated into arabic.
Yeah, it was all fun and games until I realized that it wasn't my tent, and I had no idea who those people were
He won't talk to me. He'll only communicate using scissors
After the tests come back negative, you guys will look back on this evening with fond memories...
You don't forget tits like those, even if you are vegas drunk.
I really hope your new roommate never finds out we had a threesome with a bisexual British guy in his room the night before he moved in.
An don't say it's "personal preference" cause I don't buy it. I just want to have normal cool guy balls. I don't want to be the dude that's still rocking the equivalent of the "mid 90's bowl cut" of scrotum haircuts.
I'm sending you the three minute video I jus took,....it's of me eating a pear up close
IN THE MIDDLE OF HOOKING UP, HE IS CALLED AWAY ON AN "EMERGENCY". FUCK THAT, MATT'S CAR IS NOT AS URGENT AS MY THIRST.
When he breaks your heart after he reveals he's gay, I'll be there for you. -Love, Dad
how did you set a fucking salad on fire????????
I have drunkenly angered a family of raccoons. Please send help immediately.
On a scale of 1 to i should hide, how deep did i dig my grave?
I don't know what it is about this quarantine, but I have never written this much smutty fanfic in my life and I am loving it!
Randomize
