My whole home page is your drunken face booking, congrats.
giving a blow job on a jetski isn't as easy as it sounds.
he only lasted 2 minutes. he said it was because i was so pretty. i'm not sure what to feel right now.
His mom told be she once got turned down for playboy. 1 biggest mistake Hugh made. 2 is she hitting on me?
ARE YOU ALIVE? usually when i say lets start drinking at inappropriate times you come right over. im worried
I'm coming over to use your dick. I need to take my aggression out on something. Hope that's cool.
Aj and I already plan to tape our thumbs to our palms so we know how it feels to be a t-rex.
And I can taste the vodka through my ears. Good god.
I legit just woke up on my couch, snuggled up next to some guy who's wearing my roommate's pink bathroble. What the fuck do they put in those shots?
You told her that she shouldn't be allowed to wear clothes then when her roommate asked if you like her you said "no I just want to insert things into her"
I stand by it.
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
I just tripped over a but plug that was on the floor. It's 430 in the morning
I would fuck him just for his dog
Woke up this morning with a plate of ravioli in my bed. Who says being single can't be fun?
Mass text: You have all failed me. How have the people I loved so much let me go so long in life without ever eating a McRib sandwich?!
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