worms taste like bacon by the way.
I always wondered what they tasted like.
chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
fter the third song from an iPod commercial played I realized how much that frat sucked.
I love him. He's like the father I never had that I kind of want to fuck.
My dad told me my only assignment from now til graduation is to not die. it's a legit concern for him.
in a thick russian accent she said "im not so good with english, much better with dick"
im sober
you just pulled your sweatpants out of your bag and thanked them for being alive
can't decide if i look like a hooker or a missing member of Poison today
It's titled "A countdown to death. A psychological look at the downward spiral of actress Lindsay Lohan and her inevitable Hollywood demise" This dissertation is genius. Not a single sober moment for either Lindsay or myself. Good stuff!
those kids just got delivered to the party by the pizza guy
Yes she scared me. She had NIPPLE CLAMPS ATTACHED TO A STUN GUN.
IDK MAYBE BC I WOKE UP IN AN AIRPORT WITH A ONE WAY TICKET TO LONDON
CAPS.LOCK.AND.SPACEBAR.ARE.BROKEN.
We damn well better have a snow day tomorrow. We just broke out the rum.
You don't know happiness until you've got to smoke weed inside taco bell and then eat all you want for free
Randomize