oh, also, we're locked out of the house and we're going to have to take shelter with the hot, poss single, dad next door. i hope this turns into a porno
I had a dream that chipotle was out of burritos... Was more like a nightmare.. Gotta go make sure it wasn't real now
He was wearing his Class of 2007 shirt so I sat there for 5 minutes and read all the names of the guys I can remember giving head to.
drinking out of a sandbucket again
I do what I can to inject something into your life every day. Today, humor. Saturday. Penis.
If I interpreted our horoscopes correctly...you should be coming home with an 8 ball. Just saying.
YOU WOULD BE SEEING ME. IN MY KITCHEN. BENDING OVER MY OVEN. MAKING YOU CAKE.
Wait, that's an option?
He let me keep my Michael Jordan Bulls jersey on during sex.
It was a book called Gay Safari.
I'm so happy for you now that you have found your perfect porn novel.
So feel off my bed lastnight into the trashcan. On the plus side i thought under my bed was a cave and i went exsploring
Its not often you get to say, "The security guard at my job is my new drug dealer," but as of last night, I get to say it.
In honor of Super Tuesday, we should have the sex tonight.
I can't remember what I did last night, but judging from the state of my hair I had a pretty good time.
Had to admit my broken elbow was caused by vodka, not hockey
He's the one named Andrew. In his profile picture he is the one on the right in the monkey costume.
Randomize
