So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
Why did you send me a picture of a dick?
It was an accident sry. Not mine tho.
porn bloobers exist! never have i laughed so hard while jerking off!
I'm starting to have hip problems from having my legs spread too often.
Even when you're down just know that I will always be the one to pour alcohol into your asshole when you're on probation
Ugh. I guess I'm crying loudly or something. My mom just came in and gave me milk, chocolate, a Xanax, and her weed "for the break up blues". Her ways of affection are so odd.
It's the best! If I had one wish it would be for life to be one really long gay porno. Thats what I wish for during every 11:11.
Everything was cool till you started pissing while standing at the bar
Mom called last night while I was at the bar and asked where I was. I told her I was on the highway to the danger zone while the guys were humming the top gun theme.
You're not married and none of these idiots are committing to you so whore it up on whore island
Can we go to pirate hooker whore island then
Please don't try and hook up with one of your high school teacher's friends
How does it feel to date your dad?
I almost got decked by a guy who looked like Mr. Clean. How was your night?
last night I mixed vodka in with my protein shake... and you tell me my new years resolution was impossible
I guarantee you he will only fuck with old bitches from now on
Randomize
