i just google imaged poop.
watching "look who's talking now." getting choked up at the end when they find each other at the cabin
doesn't that movie star kirstie alley and have talking dogs in it? new low...even for you
there was some random girl that nobody really knew, standing in the corner trying to shave her armpits with a plastic butter knife.
I'm in the Wal Mart stall where we found out you weren't pregnant. This is where I'm going to propose to you. I feel like that would be the most romantic
It was like stroking your vagina with a cloud.
He SHOWED UP to the party wearing one shoe and a dinosaur hat. He kept lifting up his shirt and asking people to bite his nipple.
Fuck you, you can't judge me til you've smelt my boobs.
He told me my outfit made me look like a twelve year old then proceeded with "but you don't look like a whore"
So note to self oboe reeds soaked in Apple Rubinoff sound GREAT.
I found dried jizz from last night on my leg while feeding an infant a bottle. I am not fit to care for children
You are free to stop by. I promise to keep my penis in my leather pants
Sooooooo Your wife and your girlfriend are making cat noises at one another via text
Hung out near hay bales in sweaters then she gave me a pumpkin spice pop rocks bj. That was so freakin' seasonal.
I know what I want to do this Friday. However, it might end in me getting kicked out of an arcade and a mini golf course.
It was a good dick. I give credit where credit is due. A good dick deserves praise.
Randomize
