Keeping hand sanitizer and lube in the same drawer in the same size bottle = awful idea
ya and he came three minutes into it because he didnt have sex all summer
oh that makes more sense i knew you arent that good
If I remember taking any of my finals after tomorrow night, it will not have been a successful night.
I love drunk self when he leaves a prepacked bong for the morning... in the bathroom.
its not college until your roomate walks in on you having sex in his bed. twice
More likely there's a very shell-shocked cat wandering around somewhere, covered in potato peelings
Well, he sent me "techno kitty adventure" about 10 minutes ago. So, he could be anywhere.
You should get with him and swear you have to use lambskin condoms. That'll test his veganism.
Dude you were tripping so badly we put a pretend box around your head and you spoke silently for the rest of the night. I think pterodactyls were involved.
the cab driver said that we weren't the worst shit show he'd ever seen, CHALLENGE ACCEPTED!!
The gay is strong with you! You're more concerned about my outfit than my safety.
So if a girl goes for it you're gonna stop her and tell her you gave up ejaculation for lent?
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
It's like jay gatsby himself preordained that our genitals meet again.
I think people are normalizing furries
Randomize
