I don't know what's more sad: The fact that he fingered the side of my leg, or the fact that the side of my leg feels like a vagina.
So this girl in my math class just went to the bathroom, tampon in hand, comes back with it still in her hand starts digging around in her purse, takes her thing of birthcontrol out, goes oh fuck, and downs the rest of the pills. Got to love college.
The chance that I have herpes may have made me find god
spending the week with her family was quite possibly the longest ive ever gone without having a boner
Is it just me, or does Colt McCoy look like Herbie the Dentist from "Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer"?
After he convinced me that my friend had died and come back to life, I decided I was having sex with him that night, and that I should lay off the drugs for a while.
You know its a good sign when a girl asks who everyone is AFTER she flashes her tits to the room.
It's like they're playing jeopardy and the category is "things that make women dry."
I don't know. She kept pirouetting across the kitchen while making dinner. I just sat there stoned.
I used the light from the first guy's text notification to be able to snapchat the second guy in the dark. I am too good at juggling guys.
This means I've slept with 2 ppl that live in vans...my life is complete
I'm 99% sure I just flashed my dad with my vagina. So that's the new low now.
Whiskey. Because sometimes it's fun to have your hands go numb.
He can move his dick. Like on its own. WHY DID I NOT GIVE BLOWJOBS BEFORE?!
Three cans of beer can fit in the shower catty... multi tasking
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