No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
I found out he doesn't have a facebook, twitter, or myspace. So, I'm going to actually go to his house to spy on him.
i just assumed he broke up with her because she wasn't a freshman anymore
im failing my bio class b/c he booty calls me wednesday nights at 6 like clockwork
Dude he's not responding... I'll take that as an unpleasant visit to the clinic
I'M SO WET FOR FREEDOM
No joke, I just found $85 on the ground. Must be because I bought you all that liquor. So much good karma.
Lets trade lives
And i will lay in bed and piss all over everywhere, drink whiskey and have sex with married bears
With 4 extra seconds dedicated to the dong.
These kind of text worry me.
So for St Paddys day I colored my junk green and got a little hat for him....wanna see it before I sober up....
who knew magic tricks and sex would actually go together?
We knew it was an interesting night when we found my thong wrapped around a chocolate chip muffin in the fridge.
They're giving you narcotics aren't they?
If I offered to share would you come visit me?
If you wanna do actual business call my office. If you’re just looking to get laid you need to up your game
Randomize
