Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
She refused to give me a hand job while we were watching a war movie saying she didn't wanna disrespect the soldiers
Admitting I go to nursing school is my subtle way of saying, yes, I know every muscle in your penis and how to effectively use them.
Not enough clothes on. Not enough vagina. Not enough drugs in my body.
Then he said something about how from that angle I looked just like his mom.
Pulling over on the side of the road to set off fireworks was the worst idea you have ever had. I don't care if it was called a friendship pagoda.
My dad got me a charm braclet....his way of trying to support my gayness....
There's a man in a pumpkin/reaper outfit advertising a new head shop outside the Taco Bell. I love this town.
I tried to high-five the cop last night. he just looked at my raised hand and told me to go to bed.
Like I feel like I use my high IQ for the wrong things
hope your day is as exciting as mine- one of our trauma patients just stole an ambulance out of our bay... WITH AN EMT STILL IN IT.
We have your weave and dirt in our room.
Almost lost a vagina lip in the great shave of '16
WHEN THE HELL DOES ANYTHING IN OUR LIVES *EVER* GO AS PLANNED???
Getting so old my power naps are turning into, "can I reasonably just go to bed at this time?"
Randomize
