So I have to ask... did I meet your lumberjack expectations? I mean, minus the red flannel and all.
if being creepy is wrong, then i don't want to be right
susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
i don't want a singing card. it disturbs my hangover. give me a pack of cigs taped to a bottle of wine and fuck me without a condom. happy vday baby.
it looked like a condom graveyard when i woke up. they were everywhere
Ummmm yeah ..,.. All three girlfriends I have right now are chatting with each other at the party...... I'll see you on the other side
I maybe just had sex outside in broad daylight. At a state park. Please be proud.
Well that's the second time I've broken a lamp during sex this month. Starting to worry I'm some kind of X-man. (this one was a wall sconce and I fully smashed it with my head and it crumbled like it was made of sugar)
He might not have any marketable talents, but the kid dry humps like no other.
your ability to divide cases of beer among any given group of people equally was missed.
It's a whole movie about Joseph Gordon-Levitt watching porn and having sex... I NEED to own it..
I just wanted to be nice to your dick and you are rhyming at me.
Why is there a business card for people who need bail bonds in my wallet...
Bro, it was an EPIC night once again last night. I’m so sorry that you saw me naked.
I am high. And my mom surpised me today. Now i am high and with my mom....bad idea
Randomize
