sorry I missed your bday party.,I was vid chatting with that new guy I'm talking to all night...happy biirthday though
Threesome last night. Not that cool, you tend to pick a favorite.
i just jacked off to lindsey vonn, i feel so patriotic
USA! USA! USA!
Got home. Hugged Mom. The look on her face indicated she noticed nipple rings.
im destined to be single forever. i hope its okay if your kids come and hang out with my cats.
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
We all just did coke and we're coloring so if you're sober its pointless for you to come over here
Woke up in time for my 8:15
Good for you I'm impressed
I realized 10 minutes in it was a class from last semester
I don't know how or when he is sober long enough to donate plasma
Nothing says summer like lemonaid, but nothing says fuck yeah summer like lemonaid and vodkavodka
Well I think won that argument, as the cops were leaving, they offered me a ride to the airport
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
We were getting breakfast he shit himself in the middle of ihop. Mid bite he just yells out o fuck.
He put his SoundCloud on his Tinder bio. I felt personally attacked.
I just called my grandma crying, apologizing for being the first grandchild to have premarital sex...I'm either about to start my period or pregnant.
Randomize