Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
Tonight was like the Noah's Ark of alcohol. I had to have two of everything.
How was dinner with ur grandparents?
I was really blazed and scared they'd catch me, so when they asked about my day I was concentrating really hard on not saying smoking that instead I honestly said "Well, I had sex on your pool table, Nana."
drunk enough to think that masterbating in the pool is an awesome idea
Ordered weed last night from the delivery service, and who showed up...my old real estate broker. He said, "this is less stressful." Duh.
i swear to god even though i took those meds before coming here i did not hallucinate zulema silently throwing up into a breakfast burrito
hungover subway ride filled with german tourists and a mariachi band. too early. too fuckin early
He just told an 8 year old to go fuck himself so we probably won't be in the butterfly exhibit much longer.
i ended up playing naked naked monopoly and hangman with my dealer. i really love my life.
I truly just stopped puking in my 730 am calculus class, looked up, corrected my professor, then resumed puking my eyes out. He was both impressed and disgusted.
I'm good. We walked you back to my apartment and you demanded to eat the sandwich I made for him
yea plus he's gonna be wearing his gumby costume so that'll take a lot of pressure off too
Definitely ended up doing Coke with Chewbacca in the porta potty behind the haunted house.
fuck sobriety. I want to wake up tomorrow in a park or some shit.
In the last 2 hours I managed to have romantic starlit sex on the beach as the tide came in with not only just a gorgeous man, but one who happens to be Eastern European and finishing Harvard law school.
Oh wow. I want to be you right now.
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