fucking a dude
i mean: fucking a, dude
wow, that comma made all the difference there
I have show me your genitals stuck in my head. Except in spanish. Muestrame tus genitals. Tus genitals.
so, i drunkenly called my religious roomie because i was lost and told her if she couldn't come find me, jesus would condemn her to hell for not leading me to the light .. too much?
he refused to get me toilet paper before we started drinking so I keep wiping with his towel.
I need to get the stench of sex and broken dreams out of my room
My gynecologist inadvertently complimented your penis.
I just got turned down by a drunk fat chick. At my own birthday party. God hates me.
Who would we be if we didn't go out to drink during finals week? NOBODY
We lost Kevin again. Probably kidnapped by fattie 2 or butter-face 2 from last night. We need names and any information you can give us. Last scene with his shoe laces converted into a belt.
No our divorce decree will not have a blow job clause. Unless my alimony is greatly increased your bj's have been reduced to fantasy status.....
Its like "fucckkkkk yooouuuuuu" is echoing up my esophagus
tequila?
yep
I went to pick my brother up downtown and I stopped at a red light a homeless old man comes up knocks on the window shows me his penis and then screams money
Dont worry bro, i'll be the designated kayaker. I wouldnt want u to be drinking and kayaking.
I've got to stop fucking tourists. If Chicagos piazza is anything like their dicks. I'm moving.
New rule. If he's too busy to put the "H" in "what" then I'm too busy to put his D in me.
Randomize