I want your puppy
I meant pussy
I would rather you take my puppy
Our relationship is like that beach boys song "help me Rhonda" and I'm fucking Rhonda. And Rhondas's the whore in case you've never heard it.
it hurts more in the daytime
does it bother you that i swallowed like millions of your unborn children
actually, i try not to think about it
and i pooped them out
It was ok at first, but now im getting freaked out by him jerking off to me doing yoga
is it bad that listening to the rabbi's wife talk about how we should only be with one person is making me really, really horny for no string attached sex
I found her under my bed eating airplane pretzels.
I'm way to drunk for this play. I'm about to run up on stage and drop the main character
we knew we'd be okay when we walked up to the dealers house and he asked us to please be quiet as to not wake his nana.
Oh and I guess I added our cab driver on Facebook. He has "liked" every single one of my beach pictures. Kill me now.
Double vision is so hot when a big dick is in sight. Thank you Bud Light.
So we reenacted men's olympic skeet shooting using roman candles and flattened beer cans. That's all
you need a warning label. Just announcing that you are Scottish is seen more as a challenge. Those guys have no idea what they are getting into.
I'm over here willing to be the Yoda of fucking but I guess he just doesn't want to be a Jedi.
They want a bedroom just for their cats. And you thought we were gay.
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