If there was chocolate on Regis Philban's dick, I would totally lick it off. That's how desperate I am for some right now.
Next weekend I am getting a library card and staying my whore ass home.
it only took me 1 hour to write 8 pages. i'm never doing school work without adderall ever again.
I've gone to the bathroom 3 times. And forgot to pee. 3 times. Let's say we call it a night, I need to be found. I see a fish tank by the bar and some stairs.
I started to trust fall random people on the dance floor
i can now proudly say that ive peed off of a balcony overlooking the pacific ocean AND a balcony overlooking the atlantic ocean
Put you drinking hat aside for Tuesday. My buddy is bartending!
I just puked in my drinking hat.
I'm in Burlington Coat Factory. This place'd be great if you were on E. There're so many textures...
I'm kinda hoping that if I rub the right object, a genie will come out
My sister was crawling her way home and kept asking us to carry her,then she insisted on grabbing at our ankles til she passed out, how was your night?
I was informed that last night we held hands while puking on the curb outside the bar.
We just have a real special relationship.
Please hurry up and come back. This is so awkward. He's showing me banana videos.
This is what my life has come to. Like, I may or may not have just stolen pizza from the guy I just hooked up with's fridge when I left...
This taxi driver is not happy I am in drag
doing squats while I brush my teeth.. gotta keep the booty in check
I feel like with a dick like that he could of done more with it
Randomize
