he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
The night began with "let go home early so we can study for my 9am final" and ended with "show me your boobs for a free pack of gum".My breasts are worth 14 sticks for a dollar.
Last night was a blur. All I remember is jizzing in the squeegee bucket at a gas station.
The look on the soccer mom's face was PRICELESS.
Guess what I'm doing tomorrow?
Becoming a productive member of society?
Sam. Come on.
I can actually hear my brain cells scream as they die when she speaks.
This girl in the gym has an amazing body...too bad there's no workout routine for a face.
How was the bike ride?
Nope. High in the basement. Fruit cups.
The heaters out again. Makin a fire in thebroke toilet for warmth.
I know how I'm going to make my fortune.. designing an icepack made specifically for the vagina.
We had a pillow fight. It looks like an angel exploded here. A DRUNK ALCOHOLIC ANGEL
Though I feel a moral obligation to take you there, point out all of the male supervisors and slap you on the wrist and yell, "NO!!"
Haha! You know I mean that in a positive way. Like, "let them eat cake!" Or in our case, "let them achieve obesity from the two entree plate at Panda Express!"
After an hour of searching for my pants, we had three people looking. They were finally found in the oven.
while on the topic of showers...why is there apple juice in our bathtub?
I woke up with my shoes on but pants in the fish tank
Randomize
