bar tonight had a doorbell to get in and last night i saw my neighbors fuck on the balcony, she wore a nurse outfit. Missouri isn't so bad...
Going to a jewelry store high is not a good idea. I look like mr.t's wife.
he said he got tested two months ago... he goes with his whole family.
Almost thought it was a good idea to call his parents to thank them for having a son with an awesome dick. That high.
oh ps. last night you kept telling me to calm down because everything was fine cause you were getting "arab money"...
is it still called a breakup if its your friends boyfriend that you have stopped sleeping with?
I kept feeling my boobs..just to make sure they were still there.
Woke up this morning in a randoms bed clutching an airplane ticket. God I hope I'm still in the country
Some daaay... Bet your bottom dollar that some daaay you'll do that mollyyyy
We don't watch enough power rangers
I just saw a bunch of drunk old guys riding on the side of a modified old fire truck yelling at cars and smoking while they looked for parking...promise we will be just like them when we grow up?
I'm craigslisting fire trucks as we speak
somebody should make me the poster child for not drinking everclear..
Are you in a good mood because I stuffed you with enchiladas, ice cream, penis, and cuddles last night?
I'm sorry I pissed in your bedroom and then woke you up when I tried to jump off the balcony
Idk, I know when I drink vodka my bi side comes out and I just want to make out with a girl
Randomize
