you were mad bc i took longer then 2 minutes to finish
how in the hell can u get pulled over when ur car is parked.
Just used my last prints at the library for brackets instead of final reviews. Hello March.
The Masters... another excuse to excessivly start drinking by 1
She always manages to outslut me. I can't keep up
It's like he's trying to get head in every car except his.
On my way back to his place to see his "art". Why am I sure this is going to be nothing more than his dick in a box?
COME GET ME FR THE HOSPIGAL'!!!!!
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
yeah, you could tell they werent used to the strange things that i say. they were all outright shocked when i told one guy i hoped someone kidnapped him and stretched his dickhole over a fire hydrant
Are you saying I'm your favorite hot mess?
I'm actually my favorite my hot mess, but you're a close second.
I emptied a Vyvance capsule into my coffee pot last night and set the auto start. Pretty sure I've been drinking meth all morning
If people had ratings on Tinder I'd give you 5 out of 5 stars.
I'm one bad relationship away from owning seven cats.
because he's a firefighter, wouldn't sleeping with him be like saying thank you to the community?
Randomize
