i watch way too much csi for them to even pretend to be my friend.
you were so drunk you slurred your pauses
i cant even explain all the reasons why i dont want to fuck you right now.
we need a dd. For wednesday. At lunch. What are we doing with our lives?
succeeding
its taking every last moral i have not to steal this bike
you still have morals?
Well actually itd just be too hard to ride the bike with this large rake i just stole
I just want him to slap me with his dick and call it love
We should search craigslist for porches to sublet.
We still going to Happy Hour
Idk. I can't because it doesn't fit in my schedule of sleeping or throwing up
If you're wondering why you have playpen balls it's because we stopped at chuckie cheese on the way home.
I wonder if a fish could survive in vodka
I could
Btw I'm already known as the drunk roommate. Don't know if that's a success or a failure seeing as it hasn't even been a week since I've been here
There's like a dolphin trainer convention here or something. I will parlay this trip to Vegas into riding Shamu if its the last thing I do.
just saw the most amazing side boob. i wanted to hold it.
I despise everything about her. Except her tits.
I have acquired a mango...tonight is successful so far
Her name is susan
Randomize
