I didn't black out, the guy in the Men In Black costume erased my memory
she tried giving me head in the pool. it was more entertaining than pleasurable
Sometimes I send them texts like "I want to make you cry and lick up your tears" just to fuck with them. And THAT is how you get rid of a Stage 5 clinger.
How could I forget your birthday? I have an alarm in my phone to ask you for sex that day.
I want to own their dicks and all the attachments
I just said "okay we have 20 minutes to get each other off, ready... Set... Go!" and he picked me up and threw me on the bed. I almost came just from that.
I don't know. What do people who don't get stoned do?
Human centipede...with the teletubbies. That's what my nightmare had in it.
I don't even want to know.
Better safe and shitfaced than hungover and in need of another surgery.
He just got really stoned and kept complementing my ponytail
Tinder recommend to a friend: making threesomes easier since 2016
Yeah, he threw a chair and hit her in the side of the head. She started hysterically crying and then proceeded to continue kicking our ass at beerpong. The girls got talent.
You know that pill i snorted last night? Yeh, its just hitting me now..... At work
Just FYI: if you happen to notice a liquid of some sort on my kitchen counter with an interesting color/ texture, don't taste it
my personal favorite... An "I'm sorry you broke your finger and cant play sports for awhile" blowjob!
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