Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
My mom foundout about my dui nd just called me to come home. I just took acid like 30 min ago. Wht should i do?
The girl I was getting head from just called my dick an anteater...I hate my parents for not cutting my cock tip off.
i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
Drinking bud light and eating rice cakes...this is the closest to getting in shape for spring break as its going to get.
I think we can all look back on last night and categorize it under, " reason why Cory can't be left at the bar by himself"
Stumbled into class and into a desk. When I fell my bottle broke in my backpack. I had to leave there was vodka everywhere.
I really wanna know when trying to grow up turned into try not to throw up.
Get your ass over here, we're drinking Patron and watching My Little Pony. Patron and Ponies, do you copy?!
Today wasn't Sunday Funday, it was more like Sunday god is taking a shit on my life day
I'll do my best. he just keeps yelling beer and doing dick helicopters
I woke up and my pants were in the kitchen but my shoes were next to my bed. Do the math...
Celebrated Veteran's Day by getting a Marine (who just got back from deployment in the middle east) drunk and laid for the first time in 6 months. #Murica
there's crying, and people are upset, and there's a love triangle, and a broken heart, and so much estrogen
our moms work together...I can just see the conversation now, hey your daughter ruined my sons marriage, that's probably how it will start.
Randomize
