Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
he just tried to convince me that tylenol is a gateway drug
I negotiated the purchase of an entire tray of like 50 jello shots for $8.
There is a keg full of gin. THERE SHOULD NEVER EVER BE A KEG FULL OF GIN.
hot doctor. gonna get him to touch my tits. 'think i felt a lump' excuse in 3-2-1...
you know, this Evan Williams whiskey isn't so bad when it's watered down a bit and you're home by yourself on a Saturday listening to Snoop Dog alone in your apartment without pants or any plans for your future...
Oh god I may vomit into the teacup of debauchery.
If you're wondering where your left shoe is you lost it in a bet with a homeless guy last night
And by "schedule" I meant crumbled up liquor store receipt, that I wrote shit on.
I just got head while watching air force one. Harrison ford would be proud.
Did you seriously just hashtag my sex life as #yolo2013?
I dont' remember leaving St. Cloud, getting home, or apparently directing traffic in the middle of the fucking street while black out drunk.
I called 911 when they kicked me out of the bar last night.
Baked goods and tits. Hard to go wrong there.
We ended the night eating peanutbutter with our hands and smoking cigarettes in the house at 4am. Fucking Everclear, man.
Randomize