Call me when you're up
Great dream, you were in it
How can she be afraid to give you a blowjob? It's not like your penis is going to turn on her and eat her.
Ur just texting me random shit. That's what Twitter is for
they were just spraying pledge on themselves and calling it lemon cologne.
And surprisingly enough iPhone does not have an app for Russian mail order brides.
Wake and baked to watch the boston marathon. God I love massachusetts
Just quiet vomiting, and in between heaves she mumbled "be the pro"
just let her blow you already, it's practically animal cruelty at this point.
There is nothing more demoralizing than exchanging 150 dollar Christmas gifts with a girl your not sleeping with
i finally decided to cut him off after he he looked me dead in the eyes and said "how have i been inside you for the past twenty minutes when my pants are still on?"
I enjoy it and I rock at it. I wish there were a respectable way to make giving blow jobs a career.
He doesn't drink liquor so instead of doing a body shot off my belly button he dropped water in there and sipped it out with a straw. Look at my face: =|
I mean. I'm excited for the Seahawks too. I just love nachos.
I wanna trust fall face first on a penis.
Of two things I'm absolutely sure: 1. I only took 2 hits off that joint and 2. I definitely ran over hedwig on the way home
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