thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
I'm towing my little brother down the road on a sixty year old tractor, we're taking up the whole highway, and no one cares. I love South Dakota.
It's not just about fucking anymore... We decided we're actually in like now..
So, after having sex with my 4th overweight girl in 2 weeks, I've decided Charlie Sheen syndrome is ruining my life.
I dont think punching her boob is the type of reverse psychology that will get her to blow you.
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
Totally passed out on the dealers bed after paying him all in ones so no, i dont think i'll be getting a discount soon.
I just bought $54 in Easter crap to try and blend in the pregnancy test... And FYI, it totally worked.
Her only article of clothing is an American Flag
My roommate is watching gummy bears "race" from a mega-marshmallow to his lava lamp.
Let me tell you the story of bicurious george
just had sex in my dorm hall public bathroom while wearing my favorite cat sweater. tonight was a win
It looked like Halloween in bed... BECAUSE HE BIT MY PUSSY AND I BLED ALL OVER THE FUCKING PLACE. THEN HE FELL AND BROKE HIS TOE. AND THEN PASSED OUT WHEN HE SAW ALL OF THE BLOOD.
We got caught fucking on the couch while I was in my Godzilla onesie.
Pretty sure the delivery guy saw me taking a shit this morning
Randomize