she uses ice cubes and hums anything I want. Last night was Welcome to the jungle. it wasnt lost on me shes a puma. no shame in that 30+ game.
i was focused on more important things... like standing, and not spilling my beer
Is it bad that now when i read ingredients in the food I eat i only read it as shrooms instead of mushrooms ?
Does he know anything about your personal life besides what you look like without clothes on?
I need to get skinnier so that I know when pregnancy scares are real...
I think theres a high possibility i could be flammable.
Turns out puking in your mask makes it even harder to see out of the mask..
where are you guys? the police just woke me up on the couch outside.
fat chick, vomit on the dog, and three unidentifiable pills in my ear. all in the same ear. what the hell happened after the guests showed up?
I walked in her room to find her rubbing lotion on her face high as fuck.
There is maybe 10 hours out of any given day we aren't sober.
He's like a Lana del Rey song that took human form
I dunno what's worse, that one guy here said he'd blow somebody for Tim Horton's right now, or that someone else looks like they want to test his sincerity.
Come get me, I'm fucking scared.
This is why people in Buffalo die of heart attacks. This and wings
Guess who's now on the no-fly list? If you guessed me, you'd be right.
Randomize
