does he have a tent? the camping kind not the boner kind.
A moment of silence for all our pussy whips bro's who had to endure the NEW MOON premier!
She literally thanked me for asking before I put in her ass
They have a guy from new zealand living under their stairs.. they don't charge him rent. He just buys food and booze and bartends their house parties.
Woke up w/ the same freshman as last Saturday but we were sober this time. Is that a relationship?
He hasn't responded, but he probably just jizzed in his shorts again, so I'll give him time.
Now I don't feel so bad about telling everyone that he's 23 and needs Viagra. It's her problem now
I've never wanted to punch a 94 year old woman in the vagina, and then call her next of kin to tell them I just muff punched their Gam Gam until today.
A dude was barking out of one of the buildings so I barked back and he goes, "Oh shit! She barked back! Come to room 803 I'll fuck you!"
Why can't burritos get me drunk
I'm sorry about all of the innappropriate shoe throwing
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
This wouldn't be the first time my boss has seen me topless
When's the best time to point out that all of my orgasms this year have been self-administered? Valentine's day?
we're having rib night followed by a cultural enlightenment party
whats a cultural enlightenment party
we eat nachos and drink margaritas and tequila till we pass out
Randomize
