I just blew my nose and little bits of weed came out.
dude, I'm passing out in the fifth floor janitors closet. Let me know when the rooms opened back up
she could've warned me his penis was curved
ya i dont think she expected you to get with her boyfriend.
That bitch ruined vodka saturday
Tell them you aren't trying to make money, you are just the mr rogers of weed,its such a good feeling a very good feeling the feeling you know that were friends
It's a sit down to pee kind of hangover
Did you blackout Saturday before or after we had sex in a random snow bank?
Bored of what? I stayed up all night researching sex toys because I'm excited to do things with you that I haven't done in 29 years of having a body.
I did wake up to a random meat and cheese plate next to my bed, that was a thrill.
My drunk ass is being chauffeured around like the damn queen of England
He's a waste of a perfectly good penis.
Steven and I talked about running for office again today. It's fucked that my 3 dream jobs are marijuana bakery owner, bar owner, and president.
Ok, you agree to the terms? We can have sex, but this doesn't mean we're back together...it just means we're working on things. Got it? Sign here.
For someone who's supposed to be gay Greg is really good at seducing me into things I don't wanna do
only 3 drinks in and he showed me his fursuit, please come pick me up
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