It's an Italian thing I guess, grew up on that shit.
I'm Irish, we don't eat cow guts unless they're blended into a fine whiskey
i make out with random ppl when i drink he shouldnt feel special
I don't even know why I got my vag waxed
Ugh, tell me about it. As each day passes and the hair grows more, I get a little more depressed.
Just gave some kid head in the library. Perfect way to end the semester.
Dude, had to, it's Canada Day, I fucked her for Canada. Seriously, I put my Canadian flag on my bed and fucked her on it.
Tonights drinking will be celebratory and victorious. Picture the end of The Mighty Ducks set to beer.
It looked like his dick was wearing an argyle sweater.
It's meant to be, Cynthia. You, him, and your developed breasts are meant for each other.
That which doesn't kill you gives you an excuse to get shitfaced later
You rope them in with the looks and the boobs, and I'll bore them into submission with random trivia. We can't lose.
Brett got me a cake with a pic of me shitting
I totally have a huge crush on him though which is fucking up my "classy she-demon with limited feelings" vibe
I needed to pee, so I climbed out his window
Went to a club yesterday was dirty dancing with this guy, reached back to move my hair and punched him in the face.
ANTI-GAME
I am so proud to call you my friend
Julius Caesar had a huge penis
WTF are you reading?
Ha ha! No, the guy in the Caesar costume last night. We hooked up. His dick was huge
Randomize
