just witnessed a squirrel raping another squirrel. i couldn't look away.
Bullshit. I know you're watching The Dog Whisperer
That Cesar Milan is captivating
Small Doughy Asian men and sleeveless hoodies with nothing underneath do not mix well.
Sounds like the climatic scene of my favorite erotic novel.
I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
haha my mom just sent us out to go to all of the hair cutting places to ask for hair because deer ate all our zuchini.. and we have to pee in a bucket all day cause deer hate urine. please tell me we are normal?
i cant lie to you.
for future reference: anal bleach BEFORE boozing
Dude next time u fuck on our counters will u please let me know BEFORE I make lunch.
He's a Shit stain on my heart
So what's today's forecast for the female rollercoaster you've been riding?
Tequila is gods way of telling you don't fuck with tequila
I'm 2 seconds away from smashing the bottle and drinking it off the counter with a straw.
Is it normal, that tacos make me horny?
We were all having a bath, the three of us, then that drug dealer guy walked in and peed. Sitting down. Apparently he didn't want to offend us.
She called me at 2am crying because her late night booty call moved out of state
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