So im pretty sure the object of my emotional onterest is tired of playing with me....
I always wonder when I meet a guy from online if he needs a moment to mentally register and accept the size of my ass. maybe ill wear a dress.
It's a sad day when you realize you are no longer above fucking in movie theater bathrooms.
it must be christmas time, i've got a hankering to give a virgin a baby....
No jewlry, no bra, and no pen. I couldnt be more prepared for a friday morning class.
Just saw a baby with a T-shirt that read "I am the result of my mother forgetting to take her magic pills". I can't believe they make shit like that.
All I need is the Internet and a place to drink.
You told them that the brownies were safe, and then pointed to a passed out Ryan and said "see?"
I said we should get a taxi and you were waving down cars, three of which were cops and one of them slowed down and shook his head then kept driving
He didn't think we needed a taxi
i'm scootering my little heart out so i'm not late for a weed pickup. this is the meaning of adolescence
and then i signed some dudes back with a turkey hand print in honor of thanksgiving
YOU DESERVE A GUY WITH A NORMAL DICK DONT SETTLE FOR ANYTHING LESS
I'm disease and pregnancy free. This is an Easter for the books!
and then after the older sorority girl asked me his name she said "he gave me the rest of his mcdonalds and I decided to go home with him. it was the best that I could hope for my night"
His relationship is over as soon as he sees my boobs. I’m going to titty fuck my way into his heart
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