just walked by a lingerie store, the sign out front, "Specials for Father's Day", in no way is that just not wrong.
Is it wrong to want to cut a hole in the Tigger suit so I can molest you while I wear it?
Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here
bubblegum was invented today. we're getting drunk. end of story.
I woke up to his little sister feeling me up. I guess it's time to meet the family.
you kept going on about how you couldnt haven been the one throwing up because you were peeing in circles.
im honestly more upset that i fucked a buckeyes fan than about cheating on my boyfriend...
i gave him a hand job with one hand and held the 40 with the other. this is like freshman year all over again.
He tried to make an olympic torch by lighting a corona box on top of a pool cleaner.
Someone should make a valentines day card that says "I like the way you continuously consume thc with no concept of a limit other than drug supply" Because I'd send that to you.
We stopped mid-sex and both shotgunned a beer then got back to it. Is this what love feels like?
I just want to sing to him and rub baby oil on his head
Remember that time we were together? Yeah, I don't miss that.
I kept yelling "BY ORDER OF THE PEAKY FUCKING BLINDERS" in a terrible brummie accent at everyone I saw wearing a flatcap.
Call me a snob but I'm not banging chicks with more fingers than teeth.
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