Well whatever you do have, it sure worked on me.
A Penis?
I sware she could use her own nose as a dildo.
If your dick isn't up when i get home you're catching tonight.
rethinking that breast reduction surgery... i'm tired of drunkenly explaining the scars to guys who don't really give a shit
My rats are drinking wine. I am drinking with rats. God i am so alone.
i was gonna fuck her but then she started eatin sushi from her purse. i really need to raise my standards
Soo time for a life change, my 6 yr old sister made my gf a puke bucket for her birthday
I'm starting to question if I'm gonna need to bring a raincoat just to drink around u
U act like I can cum on command
how does someone with a Masters Degree leave poop in an ashtray in the sink? It just blows my mind
Apparently, the Mormons have taken over airports. I was told by a befuddled looking clerk I couldn't buy a beer with breakfast before 6am.
I mean, I already put pants on today. We're already halfway there
I don't want his dick, I want his flame thrower!!
Maybe if I ever do become a counselor, I would just implement a kind of intensive meme therapy.
if by making eggnog you mean drinking all the spiced rum, then yes, she's making eggnog
Why does my mask smell like doritoes?
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