I just used my 2 drink stirrers as chopsticks to get a lime out of my drink. I really am Asian.
totally got the gold medal for the best fence jump when the cops came.
Well you broke that rule when you put it in your mouth.
I am NOT getting arrested in a wig.
I've come to realize sober is a rare time of the day.
I found his retainer in my ass crack. It smells like shame.
I pretty much landed into this relationship penis first
I'm getting turned down for sex. Apparently my "sexual appetite" cannot be satiated even by a man who's such a deviant he went to prison for jerking off in his car.
I saw Nicolas Cage's face in the moon. Those were good shrooms.
I've never seen an uncircumcised dick in real life and the internet indicates I don't want to.
So he noticed that I cut a half inch off of my hair. Guess who just earned himself some road head on the way to the twin cities?
like I'd leave you in a situation like that..pfft. what kinda friend do you think I am?
...a stoned one.
My life is pants optional.
its liver damage thursday
The ass gains better be worth it
Randomize
