My mind said no, but my drink said yes.
This is why I'm not putting my name in lights over your bed.
It's been over a month and I still can't find the bra I wore out on new years eve.
i realized our last day of finals is on cinco de mayo....it's god's way of saying drink ridiculous amounts of tequila and wear sombreros
You're a college freshman. Its your job to be pathetic. And drunk. But mostly pathetic
Incoming: this is a booty call. To accept, please reply with an appropriate time. To reject, please reply "N" and the information will be filed for future reference.
ps I'm eating candy off our sex sheets. gotta say the only thing better than sweet tarts is sweet tarts with a hint of sex. perfect post vday situation
do you know how much drugs we can buy now that you got that raise at work
Today is a spill-drugs-all-over-myself kind of day.
Honestly I don't even have room for feelings after that Taco Bell
I was the oldest, shortest, and soberest at the New Years party last night. My life sucks
I have in my possession one ukulele shaped package.
Came home to butt plugs and dildos in the bathroom sink WTF
Spring cleaning
Are you okay? You're not sitting at home on facebook. I'm worried about you.
my favorite part was when you kept waving @ that guy and insisiting it was your cousin..and it wasnt and wondering why he wasnt waving back lol you were legit PISSED
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