? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
its a sex-hate relationship...no love involved
coulda been worse. everyone in the drunk tank got free mcdonalds breakfast
Listen. I'm a changed woman. I have no problem using him for sex.
He told me he wanted to show me something beautiful, then just started peeing off the bridge into oncoming traffic
I would say I'm the man in the relationship but I'm cuddled on the couch eating cake mix and water.
Of course I will... FYI I just gave my balls a crew cut.
I'm just so happy. I go to sleep and when I wake up there will be chocolate milk and penis.
You left me a voice message at 5 a.m. It was mostly incoherent noise, you screaming my name and then something about a man with two butt holes...
You had a hat of bras. Probably a good dozen, which is totally impressive for a Thirsty Thursday
My dick pics could make it to the popular page on Instagram.
You can't have your cake and publicly stick your dick in it too
I'm beginning a new chapter of my life in which our fridge will always be stocked with jello shots. I'm excited to embark down this road to fruity, semi-solid alcoholism.
You don't usually get feedback after a one night stand... But you hit it out of the park. I'm proud to call you a friend.
they are cutting me off...little do they know I am making a 75 yr old man i named Herbert buy me drinks now...no shame at 11 am...
Randomize
